I look down at my flat belly and begin to shake. My whole body trembles as I collapse on the floor feeling the most shame I have in my entire life. Guilt. No words can even begin to describe it. I slowly walk out of the spinning room and lie down on a soft love seat. Curling up I realize that it will not be long before the whole world knows. I can't live like this. Shaking my head I wipe tears from my eyes. Tomorrow. Tomorrow I will have to tell someone. My entire body shakes from the force of the sobs that tear from my soul. Two words. Two words pound in my temples as I lie there. "I'm pregnant".

I woke up crying that night. A young girl of 14 years old, I knew both the horrors of life and the joys of living. I knew at that point that I was not pregnant, nor had ever been, but for the first time in my life, I knew. I knew the feeling of guilt. I knew the feeling of dreading life. I knew the feeling of utter helplessness as one so small began to determine the course of my life. I knew the feeling of being so desperate that abortion seemed like the only answer. I never saw the ending of my dream;I don't think Christ wanted me to.

That night I wept. I cried for the unborn. Shedding tears for the girls who had no where to turn. As I lay there, clutching my virgin womb, I wept with a passion that forever changed my dreams.



Thanks to Heather-Ann for jogging my memory, your conversations are inspiring.