In a recent episode of the NorthStar Narrative Podcast, Stephanie Shafer sat down with Mariesa Grotto, Associate Vice President of Accreditation with the Middle States Association, to talk about something many parents are wrestling with today:

Is the traditional education path the best path for every child?

With more than 20 years of experience across public, private, Christian, and international schools, Mariesa brings a rare global perspective to a growing conversation — one that places parents back at the center of their child’s education. You can listen to the full conversation here!

Education Is Meant to Be a Partnership

Throughout the conversation, one idea kept resurfacing:

Education works best when parents and schools partner together.

Mariesa described education not as something that happens to children, but something that families and educators build together.

“I love the way she speaks about education as a partnership where parents and schools work together to help children flourish.”
— Stephanie Shafer

That partnership becomes especially important as families explore alternative pathways like homeschooling, hybrid learning, and online education.

Even Experts Don’t Have It All Figured Out

When Mariesa made the decision to homeschool her own child, she was already a seasoned educator and administrator.

And still, she had doubts.

“There were days when I felt like, I don’t know what I’m doing… So it’s such a natural thing to question.”

Her encouragement to parents was simple but freeing:

“You’re showing up and just being present and available. I almost feel like there’s no way you can get it wrong if you stick with it long enough.”

In other words — you don’t have to be an expert to be effective.

A Global Shift Toward Deeper Learning

After relocating to Spain and experiencing international education firsthand, Mariesa noticed a major difference in how students are taught.

Instead of focusing on memorization and performance, many international schools prioritize:

• Critical thinking
• Depth of understanding
• Balance between school and life

Her daughter immediately noticed the difference.

“Wait a minute… you didn’t tell me this was going to be on the exam.”

Because in this model, the expectation isn’t to memorize — it’s to truly understand.

Mariesa believes this is part of a broader shift:

“I think we’re seeing a huge revolution in education.”

Balance Matters More Than We Think

One of the most powerful takeaways from the conversation was the role of balance.

In many international school systems:

• Homework is intentionally limited
• Family time is protected
• Learning doesn’t dominate home life

For example, younger students may only receive about 10 minutes of homework — not because academics are less important, but because:

“We do not expect you to teach at home… we want your child to remember what they did in class.”

Assignments are even structured to support family rhythms:

“It’s assigned on a Friday and collected on a Friday because we want to give parents the opportunity to manage their family time.”

This reflects a deeper belief:

Education should support family life — not compete with it.

Education Should Be Built Around the Child

Mariesa emphasized that motivated learners are rarely created through pressure — but through alignment.

When education connects to a child’s interests, learning becomes natural.

“Tune into what interests your child. That is always the solution.”

She encourages parents to rethink behaviors that may appear challenging.

“Even the things that you see as problems… often wind up being their greatest strength.”

A child who argues may be a future leader.
A child who struggles in traditional formats may thrive in alternative ones.

The Five Foundations Parents Can Build at Home

Mariesa shared a framework from her Parent’s Guide to Building Your Legacy presentation — five areas that parents can influence regardless of schooling type.

1. Motivation

Start with daily reading — based on what your child enjoys.

“If they want to read picture books in high school, don’t discourage them. You are building motivation.”

2. Balance

Creative outlets help children process stress and develop healthy habits.

“Play is the precursor to the creative things you do later in life.”

3. Emotional & Spiritual Grounding

Children need space to talk about emotions.

“Being able to say, ‘That hurt my feelings’… I cannot tell you how many adults lack that ability.”

4. Ownership

Let children experience natural consequences.

“You have to put them in a position to take the reins on their own life.”

5. Capability

Movement and physical awareness build resilience.

These skills — not just academic outcomes — are what prepare children for adulthood.

A New Way to Think About Education

Perhaps the most freeing idea shared during the conversation was this:

Education doesn’t have to look the way it did for you.

“Step back and just imagine… it could be entirely different.”

For many families, this may mean exploring:

• Flexible learning models
• Interest-based pathways
• Global perspectives
• Online options

It’s not about rejecting traditional education — it’s about recognizing that:

One path doesn’t fit every child.

Final Encouragement

At its core, this conversation was not about systems — it was about people.

About parents learning alongside their children.

About creating space for growth.

About education becoming a shared journey instead of a fixed formula.

“You’ve never experienced this moment in time with this child before… let’s figure it out together.”

🎧 To hear the full conversation with Mariesa Grotto, listen to this episode of the NorthStar Narrative Podcast: Parent Advocacy in Education